I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
