Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
