Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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