If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
