Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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