Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
