TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
