Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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