Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I see more hoeing in ur future
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
