This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
