Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
