God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
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