and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
