Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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