I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
