We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
