I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
we should paint friendship bongs
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