I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
The feeling are messing with the penis
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
