Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
