Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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