I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
