hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
