Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
