is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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