I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
