I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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