Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
