You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Can I color on your dick again?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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