Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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