It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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