That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I should be sponsored by Trojan
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
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