It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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