I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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