Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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