is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
