you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
