how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Randomize
