I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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