It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
