Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
