if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
