I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
