Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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