i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
