Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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