fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
