If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Randomize
