I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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