bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
