All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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